Strange Dreaming

Weather: 80 & breezy
Drinks: Hammerheads

Last night I dreamt about Asshat, Angelfish's father.

I was at a beautiful beach resort, the sunlight bright and beautiful, the waves crashing to shore, and people mingling about. I saw my sister, standing near a bar.

She greeted me and said, "Guess who's getting me some water?"

I turned to the bar and saw Asshat's back. Dressed in slacks and a button down, he looked slimmer than I remember, and as he turned to face us, much more handsome, too.

Oh look who it is, I exclaimed, petrified, and instantly flush with anger.

In his hands were two drinks, one large clear glass of water, and one clear shot glass, also filled with water.

He handed the large glass to my sister and held the shot glass to me. I didn't move a muscle to retrieve it.

We exchanged a few hateful comments and he began to walk away quickly. . . to which I called out, "I have the most beautiful daughter, and you have NOTHING!"



Ahem. Ms. Bluebella, the doctor will see you now.

My First XC

Weather:82 & Sunny
Drinks: Pina Coladas

7 Miles cross country with 7000 other crazies in the Largest XC race in North America turned into this:



We were met with 8 creek crossings, mud, mud and more mud!

It. Was. Awesome.

Three guys and I made the scramble in just over 2 hours. Some areas in the forest were so narrow we had no choice but to walk and wait in line for our turn to jump 6 - 10 feet into an icy creek, only to be met with an equally steep cliff on the other side. Thank goodness for our team, they hauled me up the embankments more than once, and caught me from slippery mud slicks 30 feet downhill.

It's nice to know, at 34 years old, I'm still finding new things to be brave enough to try. Rock On!

Insert BlueBella Here

Weather: 82
Drinks: Pina Coladas

I just got back from 5 days of looking at this,

from one of these:

Take me back. NOW.

The Road

Weather: 79 & Fair
Drinks: Vodka Lemonade

The road ahead.

Wouldn't it be nice to see where that left curve leads? Instead we just keep pacing along, and the path unfurls, for better or for worse.

Luckily, my cohorts are still mostly along for the ride, and can be appeased with a roll of Ritz. . . and promise of a trip to the park.

We put in 3-ish miles tonight, even though we've been battling fevers, coughs, sinus infections, throat infections, ear infections, massive vomiting and not to leave out diarrhea this week. Our Hot Doctor ventured to tell me Angelfish most likely has influenza, but NOT TO PANIC! Luckily her fever broke this morning and she was able to hold down liquids today.

I've been working from home as possible but ended up having to send the Nanny home early today as she's developed fever and aches. Lysol is my new best friend.

But, despite all that, our need to get outside and blow the stink off outweighed the heavy burn in my chest that has been percolating since early this morning. And I'm still trying to think a 7 mile cross country race in November is a good idea, as well as a 3+ mile turkey trot for Thanksgiving. Yeesh.

Anyways, the answers about our direction in life are about as evasive to me as ever, even with the crisp fresh air. I still don't know why I question it so much. Seems the only thing I ever really wanted was to not be alone . . and well, three kids has a way of solving that one right quick. Maybe I'm just still disappointed I tried so hard to make good decisions about that guy this past summer and despite my best efforts I still ended up getting hurt.

Universe, you're teaching me some hells kinds of lessons, ok? It's alright to catch me a break for a minute. For real. And Sea Monkey having his second bout of diarrhea today on the toilet doesn't count. He still shit down his leg this morning. And there's still vomit in my bed from last night.

Now go hug your spouse - good and tight. I'm going to have a(nother) glass of wine.

Enter the Old Hag & the Half Marathoning Birthday

Weather: 82 & Sunny
Drinks: Gin & Tonic

It's that time of year again . . .time to dust off the warty nose and hunch back and let out a hearty cackle to the skies.

Ok, I'll admit it. I'm the old hag. For real.

Over the summer I fought off dating a really amazing guy. Then this fall I decided to let myself toy with the idea of falling for him. Well. . . turns out I fell and he didn't. Even 'amazing' guys can pull off really bullshit moves. Nice turn around, huh?

So I've cried my tiny bitter tears and carefully stuffed my old black heart back in the crate of soft peat where it belongs. I am the old hag. For ever and ever, amen.

But I'm still trying to process why I've managed to have 3 gorgeous children but can't manage to secure a fabulous mate. Even the good ones go bad - this fall proved it.

Ok - enough bitching.

Lots of good stuff is happening, too.

My Half Marathon was a raucous SUCCESS! I trained and trained and trained for it this summer and it was the most fulfilling thing I think I could have done for myself.

Thank you Givigirl for championing the idea for me (even if you don't remember it). And special thanks to Prom Queen and her Man for energizing the day. Oh yeah, and to my folks for wrangling the kids so many times I had long walks to train. And my Sis for bringing the whole family up for the weekend! And the academy, and my agent . . .

We had an absolute blast and I can't tell you the feeling of jogging down the gates to the finish line. I had made myself a stupid shirt proclaiming it was my birthday - which it was - and all the way folks cheered me Happy Birthday! I felt like a rock star and the best part is I'm truly in the best shape I've been in in YEARS. Last year - birthday in the hospital on bedrest waiting for Angelfish . . this year - half marathon! Woo hoo!



So enough bragging.

More to tell but I'm working from home today so I guess I'd better get some work done. Yo.

One

Weather: 80 & sunny
Drinks: Champagne

Happy first birthday my sweet!

You are truly my little angel and I love you to pieces.

Weather: 79 & still
Drinks: Bloody Mary's

Knowing I've been down in the dumps this past week, my lovely Mom - bless her heart, shot me an email this morning happily titled: Beach Babe

"Thought this pic would cheer you up!" it touted.

And up popped a picture of me, on a beach, in a tiny bikini, with all the right curves in all the right places . .. when I was all of 19. If ever I was smokin, that was it.

Really, Mom? Really?

REALLY.